Posted by: Jonjon | April 11, 2009

Arguments – Anger – Acceptance

Arguments really are pointless conversations.

Take the following example…..a conversation between a teacher and a student. The teacher immediately jumps to the conclusion that everything his student says would be wrong, because the student is young and lacks the years of experience he has. So as soon as the conversation starts, the student will always be proven wrong, because the teacher will infer everything said from the student in a way that will prove the student wrong.

Student “I feel a bit alone in this world. I am compassionate and selfless, but the other people are not. I just can’t seem to find anyone that I can relate to”

Teacher “This is because you lack experience. I have many years of I know why people do the things they do. But you, you stay in your house and never go out, thus lacking the experience”

Student “I don’t always stay in the house. I alway try to put myself in other people’s shoes, so I can relate to what people are going through. The point that I am making is that I can’t seem to find someone with the same personality”

Teacher “Why would you find someone with the same personality? It would be not do you any good by being with someone that you can get along with. I rather be with someone that pisses me off so I can learn something from it”

Student “..I don’t want to find someone with the same personality…I was just making the point that there are just not enough kind people in this world, and I get a bit sick of always hanging around people who are selfish rather than selfless”

Teacher “…You have a blockage. We are all connected. You think that you are seperate, but you are not. You are the same as everyone else.

Student “I can feel, and react, and have emotions as everyone else, this is true. But …I do things differently. Instead of picking up a wallet that someone has dropped on the street and keeping it to myself, I would do it differently and give it to the police”

Teacher “You just have not enough years of experience. I have gone through hardship and poverty, and know the feeling of giving it to the police when I was completely stripped of everything”

Student “…I have had similar experiences…Anyways, I just haven’t met anyone who is selfless and loving….It seems like you have had much experience with people in your life. Have you ever had anyone that you admired? “

Teacher “I admired everyone that I come across”

Student “…Obviously. I do too, but when I say admire, I meant…especially admired”

Teacher “I only admire the small things, not the big things”

Student “….Come on……. …stop redefining everything……How about..idolised?

Teacher “..Buddah or mother Teresa, but they are too high up there in order for everyone else to follow”

Student “..Ahh..that’s the answer that I was looking for. You know..sometimes..I just don’t understand why I just can’t live as happily as everyone else around me. I always see my neighbors, waking up at anytime they want, doing the gardening or inviting friends over for a drink and having a few laughs, whilst I have to wake up at certain times to do my practice in order to release the fears I carry in this world one bit each day.

Teacher ” I never felt afraid, or unhappy. You just don’t have enough experience. They are laughing, but they are not happy”

Student ” …You say that about my mum too, but she is always happy…I rarely see her unhappy..she is always so optimistic”

Teacher “No one really… happy”

Student “….Well…you’ve reinterpreted my message again. …When I say happy…I meant….happier than the average people on this planet. Sometimes you confuse me. I don’t understand your definition of happy. You have to specifiy in what aspects of consciousness you are referring to. If no one really is happy, then who is?…

Teacher “People are sad. I am happy at the fact that some people are stepping foward. But I am sad that has taken them so long in order to step foward. “

Student “Well…it’s hard isn’t it. You come into this life and you forget”

Teacher “No, …they know what is coming…and they know it’s not going to be pretty. “

Student “..yeah…….but …I don’t think anyone really knows”

Teacher “Yes they know”

Student “No….they are not like you. They can’t forsee the future. They are just living selfishlessly without knowing the consequences”

Teacher “You are WRONG, …there is not a single person that I have met that have never known that they are doing anything wrong”

Student “…umm I agree with you on that comment, I just don’t see why you have to say I am wrong, since you just jumped to a new idea. That is unfair, always saying that I am wrong, when you are just misinterpreting everything”

Teacher ” ….I am tired, going to sleep”

Lesson Learnt
The teacher has just made his student angry.

But there are many lessons to be learnt. The lesser of the important ones are that the student has to take steps in order to stand up for himself. In order to do this, the student must realise who he really is. This is about having an identity. If you have no identity in life, ..people around you (teachers) will eventually throw you around the room, especially teachers with huge egos or teachers who always want to win.

However, the most important lesson to be learnt is that. It is not important, and it shouldn’t matter who is wrong or right. The whole conversation becomes pointless when people get so stuck into trying to prove that they are right.

The important thing however is to learn acceptance.

You must accept the teacher for who they are. This is the only way to release the anger that you carry. Acceptance is very important. In order to accept, you must learn how to forgive. Forgive the way that people treat you, and the anger will go away. Without taking a step to forgive someone, you will carry unreleased anger with you for your entire life. By becoming forgiving, you will also learn tolerance. And by learning tolerance, then your heart will be able to be opened to people. By opening your heart, you will have less fear and more love. By having less fear and more love, you will be able to have friends, even if they are not perfect.


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